Black Lens
by Clepsydra-Delphinus
Summary: Darkness has consumed Ginny's soul since she escaped the chamber in her first year. Now the one spark of light that she has in her life is all she has to cling to and she won't let go, not at any cost.
1. Default Chapter

Author: Clepsydra_Delphinus

Disclaimer: 

This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

This fic is het, if the idea of two persons of opposite genders being in love is repulsive to you then please do not continue reading. 

This fic does not contain pink elephants. If you are looking for a fic featuring pink elephants I suggest you go somewhere else.

Summary: Darkness has consumed Ginny's soul since she escaped the chamber in her first year. Now the one spark of light that she has in her life is all she has to cling to and she won't let go, not at any cost.

Author's Note: I would like to thank everyone that has beta'd this fic. So thanks to Anya, Roxy, Ari, Meri, Nick, Proserpina and anyone I may have forgotten. Even if you only made small changes, it has made all the difference. 

Special thanks to Light Iniquity and Aleph, both of whom have contributed enormously and have changed this fic beyond recognition.

The first years had finished being sorted and the feast had begun. The sorting had been completely boring. Sometimes it was interesting, for example when someone fell over or when there was a particularly famous student - Harry Potter being the most obvious example. It was also good to see who your new housemates were, but there were a hundred and fifty of the buggers and when you've seen one nervous little first year sitting on a chair with a hat on, you've seen them all. 

Ginny Weasley, a fourth year, sister of the infamous Weasley twins, and 'that girl whom You-Know-Who made kill chickens', was watching the new first years with an eagle eye. She was a small girl with prominent features, a skinny body and a shock of shoulder length red hair. Her mouth was thin and was currently pressed very tightly together. She skimmed the rows of faces that lined the house tables one by one, following their gaze, noting each one that fell on Harry Potter.

There were three possible candidates - a large Ravenclaw girl with mousy brown piggy tails; a frail Hufflepuff with yellow white hair and blue eyes with puffy lids; and a boy in Gryffindor. At the Slytherin table the only likely lad was Draco Malfoy and it would be a cold day in hell before she approached him. She searched for anyone who looked at Harry with the same slack jawed admiration as she had once done. Now Harry was just a burning passion, there all the time but rarely obvious. Gazing at their faces in turn, she memorised them so she could recognise them in a crowd. 

After having given up looking for new members to the club', she let her gaze rest on Harry Potter, her favourite thing to stare at. For the past few summers he'd come to stay at the Burrow just before the holidays ended. Each August Harry looked a little more empty - thinner, frailer and his eyes more haunted than they were the previous year. It was painful yet mesmerising to watch him. His eyes gained depth. When Ginny had first seen those glittering emerald eyes they had been wide-eyed, innocent and perfect. After each horrifying experience he had, a flame would begin burning in his eyes. A dark flicker within them that showed a deeper, more beautiful person. He had a new air about him this year. It was in the way he walked and moved. Even Ron, the master of ignoring the painfully obvious, had noticed. It had been there since after the third task. Whatever had happened (no one had told her precisely) had knocked something out of him. He projected an attitude that ! said 'There is nothing you can do that will hurt me any more.' 

Currently, he was nibbling on a chip and explaining to Hermione (and Ron, whom the explanation had originally been intended for) about the rules of some Muggle sport called 'football'. He was explaining the offside rule to Hermione for the third time; Ron seemed to have understood it straight away.

Harry turned and saw Ginny looking at him. She looked away sheepishly and her eyes met with those of Colin Creevey, who had his camera hanging around his neck as usual. She indicated that she wanted to talk to him, and stood up and left the Great Hall. She didn't have to wait long before Colin joined her with a wide grin on his face.

"Hullo Colin, how was your holiday?"

"Great!" Colin squeaked a little too highly. He cleared his throat and tried again. "Great, my parents took me and my brother to Blackpool for a weekend. I went on the Pepsi Max ten times and on the Revolution once, I wanted to go on again but Dennis threw up. It was all pink from the candy floss..." Colin petered out, sensing quite correctly that this wasn't of interest to Ginny. "So how was your holiday Gin?" 

She sighed and rolled her eyes. "Terrible! Ron spilled a bottle of Magical Mess Remover on my favourite robes, and Harry didn't come to stay either. Dumbledore said we weren't allowed to go and get him because it's safer for him at the Dursleys." Colin's face fell slightly. 

"So," she asked, "Did you get any good pictures then?" He dug in his pocket and produced a stack of photos. 

"That's the view from Blackpool tower, that's my brother and me building a sand castle. My dad took that one, that's why it's all blurry. That's the golden mile with" 

Ginny handed the photos back disinterestedly. "Lovely, Colin. I meant do you have any pictures of Harry?"

Colin looked crestfallen as he pulled out three photos. "I took these last year. I didn't see him over the summer. How could I? He was in Surrey."

Ginny beamed again, snatched the photos out of Colin's hand and looked at them hungrily. There was one of Harry just after the third task. He was dirty, bloody and looked horrified. Ginny couldn't bear to look at it for long. It reminded her that she hadn't been there to hold him and tell him that everything would be all right. She moved the photo to the back of the small stack and looked at the next one. It had been taken earlier in the year. Harry was facing Malfoy. Hermione was at his side, sporting long buckteeth, and Goyle stood by Malfoy covered in boils.

Ginny grudgingly admired Malfoy, and indeed, Voldemort for not running from Harry when he got that "I'm going to fucking kill you" look in his eyes. Harry's eyes were burning into Malfoy. She traced a finger over the photo, caressing Harry's scowl with her finger. Deciding that she wanted to keep the pictures, she gave Colin a peck on the cheek before taking all three upstairs with her. Colin ran after her.

"Wait! Gin! Wait! When's the next time we meet?" He said the 'we' very significantly. Ginny scowled at him.

"It's not safe to talk about us in public! Do you understand?" He swallowed and nodded apologetically. Ginny favoured him with a small smile, which melted Colin's little heart. 

"We'll meet in the tower tomorrow at eleven p.m. sharp. Don't be late." And with that she dashed upstairs. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ginny awoke the next morning sprawled out on her bed and looking ghastly. Remembering what she'd been doing last night, she sat up and looked at the end of her bed. There were three business cards made of an expensive creamy card and beautifully penned in thick black ink sitting there. She tapped the ink with her finger to check that it was dry, then picked them up and put them in her bag.

Still in her pyjamas, Ginny went into the bathroom to carry out the ritual of her personal grooming. She brushed her teeth, then scrubbed her face clean ready for the day's makeup. It took three goes to apply it to her satisfaction, and the complicated fixing charm she used took almost fifteen minutes. That done, she quickly brushed her hair and got dressed, then looked at herself in the mirror. She was definitely filling out, she thought. After all, she didn't run around as much as she did when she was younger, and Mrs Weasley's cooking was taking its toll. Ginny pushed her robes against her stomach and examined her side profile.

Tina Wellington pushed her out of the way as she headed to the bathroom. "Yes dear, you're enormous, now shift." 

Ginny stuck her tongue out, and Tina grinned as she disappeared into the bathroom. A few moments later she stuck her head out of the bathroom again with her toothbrush in her mouth. "Gin? What do you think, Justin Finch-Fletchley in the fifth year, is he gay or just a little bit camp?" 

Ginny sat down on her bed and thought for a moment. "A bit camp, I think. Why?" 

Tina gave a devilish grin, which spilled froth down her chin. Ginny wrinkled her nose. "You didn't, did you?" 

"What?" 

"Anything." 

"God no! I was just wondering if it was a friendly bum squeeze or an 'I want a grope in an abandoned classroom' bum squeeze. You're no help, but I still reckon I'll be in the old charms room tonight." 

Ginny smiled at the sound of her friend spitting and gargling with gusto. She heard the tap run briefly, then Tina came out of the bathroom and sat next to her on the bed.

"Gin? Do you still fancy Harry Potter?"

She sat up straight, feeling her face burning up under the stares of the other girls in the dorm. "No, no, of course not. Why would you think? God no, Potter...Eurgh."

Tina groaned and smiled knowingly at Ginny. She forced her face into a reassuring smile. "Ok, I admit I may have fancied him in the first year, but..." Tina glared at her. "...and the second..." Everyone in the dorm glared at her. "Ok, maybe a little bit in the third, but I finally decided that there is nothing special about Harry Potter and I am not going to spend my life moping over him," Ginny finally conceded.

Allison Slayter rubbed her eyes and yawned. "Good for you. Show Potter that you don't need him, even if his eyes are green as fresh pickled toad." 

Ginny went bright red and buried her face in her pillow and mumbled "I told you, that wasn't me, It was erm... Fred?"

Tina hit Ginny over the head with her hairbrush. "So, what do you want this year? Or more importantly, who do you want this year?" 

Ginny gave a conspiratorial grin and hoisted her school bag onto her shoulder. She smiled at Tina. "For me to know and you to wonder about. I'm going to go have breakfast." 

The girls gave a slight smirk, and Tina waved a brush vaguely in her direction. "Right, babes. And if I'm not back till late tonight, you'll know why." 

Ginny rolled her eyes at her friend as she walked out the door. As she shut it, she could hear the girls inside giggling, a nasty noise when directed at you. Checking the business cards were still in her bag, she set off downstairs for breakfast.

The Great Hall was bustling with noise. In their excitement, most of the first years had been up and dressed and pacing in their dorms before anyone else in the school was even rubbing their eyes. Being down so early on the first day of term was pointless, as the timetables weren't handed out till half past eight. Until then there was nothing to but sit there and eat toast. Ginny prodded her gut inconspicuously. She'd eaten a lot over the summer. Harry would never like her at this rate.

Ginny imagined his response if she asked him out. 'No, I'm sorry, but how could you even think I'd like you. You're fat and you have a pointy nose. Sorry, Ginny.' She blushed and hung her head in shame at the thought of it; Harry would never do that to her, no matter how repulsive she was. She picked a banana out of the fruit bowl on the middle of the table, peeled it and began to nibble thoughtfully as she watched the enchanted ceiling. She'd just have to be a bit careful about what she ate, that's all.

A sixth sense accumulated from years of gazing at Harry told Ginny that he was coming. She turned to the entrance to the Great Hall, and there he was. Walking next to Ron, talking, smiling, black hair a mess and green eyes sparkling. Fresh pickled toad had nothing on them and emeralds weren't nearly so green. She wiped her bottom lip to check that there was no drool. Oh, there was that tortured look on his face that appealed to her maternal instincts (something no Weasley woman ever lacked) and those eyes that appealed to other sorts of instincts that Mrs. Weasley would have told her daughter off for even thinking about having.

Hermione Granger was walking behind them with her nose in a book. Ginny was pleased to note that she was not looking at Harry in anything other than a brotherly way; one less competitor for Harry's attention. Ginny scrutinised her brother, who was busy stuffing toast into his face as though he'd not eaten all summer. Ron could eat anything and not put on an ounce. Lucky bastard. It had killed her to be nice to him that summer, as she must for him to be her ticket to Harry. He had cottoned on to the fact that she was buttering him up, and hinted heavily all holidays that she should tidy his room. Ginny poured herself a glass of orange juice and sipped it as she stared at Harry. 

Colin came over and sat down next to Ginny, who sighed. "I suppose you can't move away now without it looking suspicious. Well?"

Colin shifted nervously. "Well, what?" 

Ginny ground her teeth. "Well, what are you doing sitting next to me unless you have something to tell me?" 

Colin blushed a deep crimson. He looked as though he was longing to say 'I love it when you get angry' but didn't dare - it would have been as good as saying 'please castrate me'. 

"Erm...Gin, I wanted to ask if we would be gaining any new members this year." 

Ginny glared furiously at Colin. She hissed through gritted teeth, "I thought I told you never to mention us in public ever again." 

Colin flinched. "Erm...yeah, sorry, please forgive me sorry, I'll be off now." He ran off to the other end of the table. 

Ginny rolled her eyes. Colin was a cute, sweet boy, and was infinitely useful as he would do whatever she asked, but he was an irritating little bugger. She'd mastered the art of hinting that he was in with a chance whilst remaining ambiguous, and as a result he dared not make a move for fear of rejection.

The timetables were passed out and the crowds starting moving off to their various lessons. Ginny was glad of her diminutive stature as it let her pass among the first years unnoticed. Keeping her eyes peeled for the students she had singled out at the welcoming feast, she soon saw the blonde Hufflepuff heading off towards the dungeons. Ginny quickened her pace and weaved her way through the crowd to get next to the girl. She grabbed her and pulled her in to an unlit corridor on their left, with the girl's small yelp of surprise drowned out by the noise of her classmates. She tried to escape but Ginny pinned her against the wall and handed one of the cards to the girl. 

"Be at the astronomy tower tonight at 11pm. Don't be late. Show this card to the boy at the door. Tell no-one, bring no-one." With that Ginny disappeared, leaving the girl to examine the card and look thoroughly baffled. 

Ginny then headed off to the North Tower where Professor Trelawney taught. She had picked Divination partly because it looked easy, but largely because Harry took it himself, and was pleasantly surprised to find she enjoyed it. You drank tea, then predicted that your friends were going to suffer great pain. They would be scared, their hands would shake, their tea would spill and they would suffer great pain. Ginny was getting a reputation for being a true seer.

The second she arrived, Professor Trelawney's voice called down to her, "Come in, my dear. I have been waiting for you." 

Ginny climbed the ladder, blinking as her eyes adjusted to the light. Professor Trelawney sat at one of the tables, her glasses sparkling in the firelight, and waved her hand towards a place setting opposite her that indicated that she had indeed been expecting her. 

"Sit, dear, sit. Would you like a cup of tea?"

Ginny nodded, and with a flick of her wand, the Professor levitated the teapot and poured her a cup. She then stood up and went over to a cupboard in the corner of the room, returning a few moments later with a crystal ball. It was different from the balls that were normally used in class; rather than misty grey in the middle, it was deep rich purple. She set it down on a silver stand and looked at Ginny. 

"The Fates have been telling me that you must consult this ball. They say you will see the future and even help to prevent it." 

Ginny nodded nervously. Everything she'd claimed to see in Divination was made up, just self-fulfilling prophecies. She peered into the murky depths of the ball. Professor Trelawney's eyes were wide with anticipation.

"What do you see, my dear?" 

The mists swirled like silk and parted, gradually revealing a shape beneath them. It was a body, a girl, covered in blood. Her face was familiar, yet not, and the thought of knowing who was going to suffer such a violent fate was so horrible that Ginny pulled away. She didn't want to see any more.

Professor Trelawney looked eagerly at her. "You saw something! What did you see?" 

"I saw..." 

Tina's beaming face popped up through the trap door. "Sorry, Professor, but the ladder was down."

Professor Trelawney gathered up her things from the table and hid them in a cupboard before turning to Tina with an unnaturally wide smile. "That's perfectly alright, my dear. Do come in. Sit down." 

Tina hauled herself up and sat at the table with Ginny. "So that's how you do so well - the Prof tells you all the answers before the lesson." 

Ginny grinned. "Don't be silly, the truth is that Professor Trelawney and I are having an affair." 

Tina burst into a fit of giggles, and Ginny wiggled an eyebrow. "Well I did say I was over Harry." 

This proved too much for the girls and they burst out laughing. Allison stuck her head up through the trapdoor and looked around, baffled. More people followed her up, and when the class was assembled, Professor Trelawney began. 

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this term, the fates have told me that we will study the augury. Turn to page two hundred and thirty-one of your textbook and study the material there, please. You have ten minutes."

Ginny found the page and immediately looked up in shock at Tina, who was positively green. The professor smiled proudly at the horrified looks of the class, and flicked away a drape to reveal a cage of mice. 

"I sense what you are thinking. In answer to your questions - yes, augury requires entrails, and yes, you will obtain them by killing these mice."

Everyone was frozen to their chairs, except Tina who swayed and looked about to faint. Professor Trelawney put the cage down in front of the class. Suddenly, everyone stood up and in a voice as one, said, "Please Miss, may I be excused?"

There was a mad stampede for the trapdoor. As they ran down the stairs to the nearest toilets, to try and calm their nerves, they heard a mystical voice calling from the classroom, 

"I knew you were going to do that."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The three friends stood in the bathroom, with Allison rubbing Tina's back and Ginny holding her hair back as she regurgitated breakfast. 

"Do you think she really meant for us to kill those poor little mice?" Allison asked Ginny, as Tina retched again.

"Possibly; she is a mad old bat." Tina went to a basin and rinsed her mouth out. Her eyes were red and she still looked nauseous. "Are you ok there, darling?" Ginny asked. 

Tina wiped her mouth and staggered into a stall to get tissue to wipe her face. She took a deep breath and declared, "Yuck!" 

"I think we should take her to the hospital wing." Allison said worriedly, and Ginny nodded agreement. They grabbed one of Tina's arms each and helped her along the corridor, pushing themselves up against the wall as people rushed past to their next lessons. 

Tina looked at Ginny with a weak smile. "I was throwing up for a long time, wasn't I?" 

"You're telling me! I was holding your hair!" 

Once at the hospital wing, Allison and Ginny left Tina in the care of Madam Pomfrey. They heard some rather grotesque noises as they left for the Potions dungeon. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You could be sure of a few things in the Wizarding world. One was that, always and forever more, Potions would be miserable. Snape was in an exceptionally foul mood today. From the hole in his desk, it could be assumed that he had spilt a particularly corrosive chemical. Perhaps it was this that made him particularly intolerant of the class, but whatever it was, the lesson promised to be bad. 

Snape greeted the two with trademark vitriol. "Miss Weasley, Miss Slayter, would you kindly tell my why you find it acceptable to waltz into my classroom nearly ten minutes late?" 

Ginny contemplated mentioning that she had done no waltzing whatsoever, but luckily Allison answered first. "We had to take Tina Wellington to the nurse." 

The professor rolled his eyes, having experience of Tina's weak gag reflex last year when he had told their class to remove the eyes from a bat. "Very well, take your seats both of you."

Snape rummaged through a cupboard, and emerged with a small jar of something that looked rather like mercury. He plonked it on his desk and looked expectantly at the class. "Can anyone tell me what this is?"

Ginny looked blank, and a brief glance around told her that she wasn't the only one that didn't know. Even the Ravenclaws had their brows knitted as they mentally scanned their textbook. 

Just her luck. "Miss Weasley!" Snape barked.

Ginny jumped and looked wide-eyed. "Yes sir?"

"Would you care to tell us what this potion is?" 

She hadn't a clue, so looked guiltily at her parchment and mumbled with embarrassment, "I don't know Sir."

Snape gave a satisfied grin that tempted Ginny towards physical violence. Gritting her teeth, she fixed her eyes on her paper. The professor's heels clicked as he wound his way through the rows of tables.

"Anyone else?" He looked around for a moment, obviously hoping that no one knew. "I don't see any point in continuing with this lesson if you are all as utterly brainless as Miss Weasley here." 

Ginny glowered at Snape, and a few people shot sympathetic looks in her direction as Snape walked back to his desk. 

"This is a sample of Minax Potion. It is one of the most dangerous potions in the world." The class gave an interested mumble and leaned forward to try and get a better look. "Minax is a potion form of the Imperius curse, with one or two noticeable differences. Can anyone suggest one?" 

It would have been the height of stupidity to voluntarily admit to knowing anything in Snape's class. Even Hermione, a walking library, offered herself up as a lamb to slaughter if she did so. He'd just keep firing questions at you until he'd passed the extent of your knowledge. Fortunately, this was not much of a dilemma for Ginny, as what she knew about Potions you could write on the back of a postage stamp without the aid of an Engorgement charm. 

"Mr Creevey? Perhaps you could suggest a difference between this and the Imperius curse?" 

Colin swallowed nervously and loosened his tie. "No sir." 

Snape rolled his eyes in irritation. He stalked over to the board and picked up a piece of chalk. "Surely someone has read their textbook?" 

There was a flash of comprehension on the face of some of the faces of the Ravenclaws, who simultaneously untangled their brows and looked confidently at Snape. Seeing that some people had the answer to his question he stopped his interrogation. He held the chalk up to the board, and made it hover there as he took his hand away by muttering a charm. The chalk then wrote the words that he spoke.

"Minax potion, although very like Imperius in its ends, is very different in its effects. Imperius, for those who don't know, is a curse that allows one person to claim total control over another. It is a difficult charm to master and is possible to overthrow. This potion has the advantage of being nigh on impossible to shake off."

There was a soft "Ooooh!" from the Ravenclaws and a scratching of quills as they took down every word. Ginny picked up her quill unwillingly.

"Can anyone tell me another difference between the two?" 

Douglas Morrison, a skinny Gryffindor with a toothy grin, put his hand up and declared, "The potion is prettier."

Snape gave a look that explained to everyone what a stupid thing this was to do. No one even laughed; they all looked at their desks, not wanting to appear to be condemning their friend or to be supporting him.

Snape spoke icily. "A point from Gryffindor. You don't seem to appreciate the severity of what we are dealing with. This potion is one of the few things that warrants the death penalty in the wizarding world, usually the Dementor's kiss. Dumbledore has insisted that we all incorporate more Defence against the Dark Arts into our syllabus. Read into this what you will after the events at the end of last year."

The mention of Cedric stilled the class. Doug looked extremely guilty; Ginny's head was flooded with memories of Harry at the end-of-year feast. It was horrifying, seeing his eyes looking so dead, and she'd been so grateful to see them flaming again when he was on the train. Alan elbowed her and she snapped back to reality to see Snape was looking murderously at her. 

"Miss Weasley, which part of my speech bored you so much your mind wandered?" 

There was nothing she could do to get out of this noose she'd hung round her neck. "Sorry sir, I was just thinking about your question," she said, frantically trying to recall the last non-Harry-related thing he'd said. 

"Oh," said Snape, obviously not believing a word of it, "and what conclusion have you come to?"

"The potion is harder to use because you have to be in close contact with your victim."

He nodded. "This we established five minutes ago whilst you were gazing into space." Ginny blushed. "Although, since you are obviously so keen on thinking about this potion, on top of the homework I shall be setting later, you will hand in an essay on the uses of Minax throughout history."

"Yes Sir." 

"And," he added as an afterthought, "Two points from Gryffindor."

Ginny nodded as though this was perfectly reasonable. She had often heard Ron complaining about how much Snape persecuted Harry, but wondered how he could possibly be any worse than he was to her. He was bad enough at normal nastiness. Poor Harry.

Snape turned to the board. The chalk had recorded everything from "The Minax potion, though very like the Imperius in its ends." to "And two points from Gryffindor." He summoned the dust off the board, to erase the writing, and started dictating to the class.

"The Minax potion, though more difficult to use, due to its state, is more reliable. Once the potion is administered, an order must be given, which the victim will be unable to fight. Trying to resist Minax potion causes pain to mount until the order is carried out, or the victim dies. The Imperius curse works by blanking your mind, and can be fought if the victim has sufficient strength of character to allow an independent thought. With the Minax potion the victim maintains his own thoughts but is forced to make the choice between death or doing as the administrator of the potion requests. One side affect of a skilfully done potion is that the victim blames himself for his actions under the curse. Eighty percent of all victims of the Minax Curse commit suicide."

Snape looked at his watch. "Well, class, your behaviour has been exceptionally bad today. If it does not improve as the term progresses then you shall be doing each class twice. Once in class time, and once in detention."

The bell rang, and everyone ran out before Snape could deduct points. 

"Didn't that potion totally creep you out?" Allison asked, as soon as they were out of the room.

Ginny nodded half-heartedly. "I'm more concerned about Tina. Where do you think she is?" 

"Oh my god, I totally forgot about her! She'll kill us for leaving her." 

Ginny rolled her eyes. "Don't be ridiculous. She'll hug us and go 'There you are, my darlings! I was worried about you.'" 

Allison giggled and they headed down up to the Great Hall for lunch. It had been a tiring morning and Ginny wanted nothing more than to get a sandwich and eat it out on the lawns. True to form, the weather had perked up now that the summer holidays were over, and the Great Hall was uncomfortably hot. Ginny ran her eyes down the Gryffindor table until she spotted Tina in the enviable position of being wedged between Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan. She was smiling flirtatiously at both of them and looked as if she'd rather not be disturbed. Ginny went over anyway, followed by Allison.

"Hello babes!" said Tina, who stood up and enveloped both of them in a hug. "There you are, my darlings! I was worried about you."

Allison raised an eyebrow and looked from Tina to Dean to Seamus. "I can see that. Where have you been all morning?" 

Tina grinned and sat down again. "Madam Pomfrey said that the last thing anyone with a weak stomach should see is Professor Snape." Both boys laughed and tried to put their arms around her shoulders, causing a minor collision, a scowl from both of them and a giggle from Tina.

Tina looked up. "Either of you want to take these lovely gentlemen off my hands?" 

Ginny grabbed a sandwich off the table and gave an apologetic grin.

"Sorry, stuff to do. I'll see you both later. Be good. And if you can't be good, be careful." Ginny warned as she waved goodbye and walked out of the hall.

Just as Ginny got to the door, it opened and cracked her on the head. She felt a blinding flash of pain and clutched her hands to her head, swaying as she reoriented herself. A familiar voice gasped and exclaimed her name as their arms scooped her up. It hurt too much to open her eyes, yet there was something comforting about the way she was being held. 

The voice, a male one, asked her if she was all right, but she shook her head and he put his arms round her shoulders to lead her out of the Great Hall. The pain was dulling now, and Ginny rubbed her head. Opening her teary eyes, she squinted up at the boy who had guided her out. There was a white blur in the dark corridor; it became slightly clearer, she saw that it was topped with black hair. Two green eyes shone out of the head. She knew who this was. Blushing, she looked up at Harry Potter.

Her knight in shining armour had saved her once again. Ginny felt as though she was going to faint, but it'd be too embarrassing, here with Harry watching. She had to go — he couldn't see her like this — he'd think she was pathetic. Ron would be along soon to fuss over her, and Tina and Allison would come to see if she was all right. Hermione would come and gush about how much of a hero Harry was; he would blush and leave quickly. She had to go, but she looked up. His green eyes were filled with such beautiful concern.

"Are areare you all right? How's your head?" 

Ginny's lip trembled slightly; her resolve had melted instantly under his gaze. She followed the sparkling lines of his irises, studied every inch of his flawless skin, his chapped lips and his chin, which was just starting to develop a definite shape. Her entire body began to tingle, as though the air between them was buzzing. She couldn't leave. Ginny slid her arms around his waist to pull him tighter into the comforting hug, closed her eyes and sighed. Harry pulled away slightly and looked down at her. 

"Are you alright?" 

Ginny nodded. His face was just inches away from hers. Little sparks jumped in her lips and she stood on tiptoe, moving up towards Harry. Their lips barely brushed, but for a moment shivers raced down her spine. Then Harry moved away from her, his face bright red.

"I'm sorry Ginny. I can't do this." He looked so sympathetic. Ginny's eyes stung. 

"Why?" she demanded. "Am I so repulsive? Am I so disgusting?" Harry looked even more embarrassed and shook his head hastily.

"No! Not at all! You're lovely! It's just it's just I'm kind of seeing someone at the moment."

Ginny glared accusingly at Harry. "You are not! I would have heard! Someone would have said something."

"It's a secret! Nobody else knows yet. Promise not to tell? Keep this between you and me? Our little secret?" 

She nodded understandingly, feeling ashamed and embarrassed, but most of all feeling betrayed. Sniffing feebly, she asked, "So who is it? Who's bagged the great Harry Potter?" 

Harry smiled mysteriously. "I'll tell you some other time. Do you want me to take you to the hospital wing?" 

Ginny shook her head, which caused it to ache more. Forcing her face into a wide smile, she said, "I'm fine. I have stuff to do. See you later!"

She turned and ran down the corridor, thinking about the look of concern on Harry's face as she left. What a sweetheart! Ginny didn't know when she had been happier. Harry Potter had said he loved her! Or as good as, anyway. The only thing between her and the man of her dreams was this mystery girlfriend. 

The cards in her pocket dug into her thigh and she remembered. She'd better give these out pronto, as there were few other times she could do it. 

Ginny tried to head back to the Great Hall to find the other two first years she wanted to give cards, but her head swam. Instead she ran through the main door, and flumped down on the grass outside. She lay back and felt the pain in her head recede as she relaxed. It was almost gone when a high voice asked,

"Gin? Are you alright?" She opened her eyes and saw Colin sitting next to her. Sitting up, she looked coolly at Colin. 

"I'm ok, you shouldn't worry." Colin squirmed a bit closer, but she pretended not to notice.

"Ginny, I saw Harry open the door onto you in the dining hall. He came in looking worried. He said you were acting strange. I said I'd keep an eye on you."

She smiled. It was nice to know someone cared, even if it was only Colin. Still, she didn't want to spend too much time with him. How to escape? She touched his cheek fleetingly and smiled. "I've got to go and hand out membership cards, but I'll be back soon." 

Colin looked hurt. He put a hand on the back of her head and leaned in as though to kiss her, but at the last second Ginny realised she couldn't face it and turned away so that he just left a wet kiss on her cheek. Forcing a smile, she stood up and walked away. The minute she got through the door she went to wash her face. Ginny entered the toilets, and found the chubby Ravenclaw girl sitting in a corner. This lucky coincidence renewed her spirit, which had been somewhat dampened by Colin's pounce. The first year was munching a chocolate bar whilst talking to Moaning Myrtle, with a discarded book beside her. She looked at Ginny with wide hazel eyes when she received the card. 

Ginny headed back to the Gryffindor common room to pick up her books for the afternoon's lessons - Care of Magical Creatures and then a single lesson of Dark Arts. She went up to her dorm to check she looked alright. Hair a bit frizzy, a little podgy (she thought), but mostly ok. A red mark was appearing down the side of her face, but she didn't want to touch that with make up as it was still hurting. She returned to the common, sat in a chair near the fire and stared into space. 

She contemplated the last hour. Harry Potter had said he liked her but he couldn't do anything because he was seeing someone. Perhaps it was like with her and Colin - she was someone he needed to keep around. But then Harry wouldn't be so manipulative Anyway, she'd nearly let Colin jump down her throat! Worse than him being an irritating git, she was way out of his league. There weren't enough students at Hogwarts for anyone to be too fussy, but he was such a nerd! It would have to be a secret arrangement. What if Harry found out about it? He'd never leave his girlfriend if she were with Colin. That twit would ruin everything. 

Ginny looked around and stretched. In the corner she noticed the first year she'd been looking for reading one of his new textbooks. Digging her quill out of her back, she wrote on the back of the last business card, Be at the Astronomy tower tonight at 11pm. Tell no one.' 

Walking towards Hagrid's hut for her next lesson, Ginny could see Tina and Allison waiting outside. Ginny ran the last 20 meters towards them and was enveloped in a hug. 

"I always knew that he was evil, really. Naughty Harry Potter beating you with a door," teased Allison. 

"Yeah," agreed Tina as she gently ran her finger down the rapidly purpling bruise on Ginny's cheek, "bad Harry Potter. But on the bright side, now you can't fancy him. No friend of mine is going to be in an abusive relationship!" 

Ginny blushed, "It was an accident, you know," and they all giggled.

The Slytherins arrived, and Hagrid slowly made his way out of his hut. Over the summer he had gained a rather nasty limp and walked clutching a knobbly black stick. Ginny smiled in sympathy to him, and Hagrid winked at her. Allison elbowed Ginny in the ribs and giggled. 

Ginny whispered in her ear, "I'm having an affair with him too!" 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the day's lessons were over, the trio headed to the Great Hall for dinner. Ginny looked at the food piled on the table and felt sick to her stomach, so decided not to eat anything. 

Tina caught sight of her friend's empty plate and looked disapproving. "Oh no you don't, Red," she said as she served her a large scoop of mashed potato.

"Yeah," agreed Allison as she prodded sausages on too. "We need to feed you up; you're too tiny and skinny by half." 

Ginny blushed. She wasn't skinny though, she thought, looking at her face. Her cheekbones were softened now; her chin was no longer practically hollowed out underneath. She missed her old slim look. The sight of the mountain of food in front of her made her gulp. There was no way that a bit of pushing it around the plate would make it appear as though there were less of it. Instead, she decided on the fun alternative, namely pointing at a far off point, saying, "Look, there's a three-headed monkey!" and running. It worked, because no matter how stupid the image, people always had a little bit of hope that it might be true.

After the meal Ginny went to the Gryffindor common room. At this time the room always filled up with people doing their homework, but she'd got up there early as she hadn't wanted pudding, and so managed to get a special table in the corner. It was usually the first taken as it meant that small groups of friends could work there without being disturbed When Harry Potter and his friends came in, of course, it was always freed up and only reclaimed if the showed no signs of wanting to work there. Ginny spread out her things and started her essay on the Minax potion. 

At half past ten Ginny slipped out to go to the Astronomy tower. A large figure stood in the shadows by the door. She breathed a sigh of relief. "Hello." He froze for a second, then slowly turned around and greeted her. "Vince, would you stay by the door and check people's cards? We have three new members tonight." He nodded and took up a threatening pose.

Ginny went inside and peered around in the gloom. There was no sign of anyone else. Taking out her wand, she whispered "Lumos", then placed it on a table so the glow illuminated the room. She went to look out of the window. The air was getting cold; summer was in its final throws. The stars were shining and beautiful. Ginny sighed and smiled peacefully. 

She felt a warm breath on her neck. She wanted to turn around but the smell of that breath told her it was Colin, and if she turned around then he'd kiss her. Instead she kept gazing out the window, gripping the windowsill and clenching her teeth, pretending not to notice him. He put his hand on her waist, and the unexpected touch sent a shudder of discomfort up her spine. Ginny clenched her teeth harder; her jaw ached. He put his other hand up to her face and ran it through her hair - Ginny winced as the grappling fingers pulled at her hair, what he presumably thought was stroking. She wanted to turn around, to stop this, but that meant kissing him and that was only a last resort. The decision was taken out of her hands.

Colin wheeled her around and looked at her tenderly for an instant. She winced inwardly; he was going to kiss her and she couldn't stop him. To stop him meant to lose her power over him, and she wasn't ready to do that yet. To stop him meant to admit she'd used him, and she couldn't do that. Ginny looked up into his eyes, and this was all the indication Colin needed of her willingness. He moved towards her, looming closer, an inescapable fate. She stood limp, forcing herself to respond to the moist, warm lips pressed against hers. He kissed as in the old black and white films, pressing his mouth on to hers and screwing his teeth around.

Ginny felt his hands inch up. She was aware, painfully aware, where those hands were headed. He then lost patience with the idea of doing this gradually, and placed one hand directly on Ginny's breast like a suction cup. She gasped, partly from shock and partly from pain as his fingers dug into her chest. Ginny began pushing against Colin's chest. He seemed to think she was admiring his manly physique, rather than an attempt to get away, but couldn't ignore it when she gave him an abrupt two-handed shove off her.

"I thought you liked me," he said, bewildered.

Ginny's mind was racing. Colin was very helpful for her organisation, and she couldn't lose him entirely. If she blew him off now, he'd leave her and then she'd be up the proverbial creek with out a paddle. She swallowed her disgust. "I'm sorry Colin, you just surprised me, that's all." Colin moved back towards her. Ginny put her hand out to stop him. "And I don't think I'm ready for that."

Colin looked disappointed and looked at the floor. "You don't like me do you? You ignored me all day. Are you ashamed of me?" 

Ginny would have dearly loved to answer "Correct, correct, correct, now go to the front of the class." but she couldn't. Instead she led him over to the chairs, which were positioned in a circle, and spoke to him as one might speak to a small child.

"Listen, Colin, if I were to let everyone know that you and I were an... an... that I liked you, you realise what would happen don't you?" Colin shook his head, looking bewildered. 

"Everyone would tease me. Not you, me. My friends would disown me and everyone would hate me." Ok, she thought, so I'm exaggerating, but it seems that way to me. Colin looked as if he thought that this was not a bad thing. "Now Colin, if this were to happen, I would be very miserable, and I would have to leave you in order to be happy again. We wouldn't last. So... we have to keep it a secret. OK? No-one... no-one must know. If anyone asks, I'll deny everything." 

Colin looked hurt but he nodded. Ginny feared he was going to start kissing her again, and was saved a by knock on the door. 

It opened to reveal quite a collection of people, all waving the little green and gold membership cards. She stepped aside to allow them in, and there was a rush to the chairs, leaving, of course, the one at the head of the gathering for Ginny.

Vince pointed at the door. "Is this all of them, or do I have to stand guard all night?" 

Ginny ran her eyes around the room doing a mental head count. "No, Vince, this is everyone. Take a seat. Now guys, say hi to our new members - everyone, welcome to the Harry Potter fan club."


	2. Chapter 2

Author: Clepsydra_Delphinus Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. This fic is het, if the idea of two persons of opposite genders being in love is repulsive to you then please do not continue reading. This fic does not contain pink elephants. If you are looking for a fic featuring pink elephants I suggest you go somewhere else. Summary: Darkness has consumed Ginny's soul since she escaped the chamber in her first year. Now the one spark of light that she has in her life is all she has to cling to and she won't let go, not at any cost. Author's Note: Massive massive thanks to Light_Iniquity, for her huge enormous great big help in making this fic what it is. Dead sexy she is. *smooches her*  
  
Chapter 2.  
  
"There were Basilisk attacks in my first year. When Harry killed the Basilisk everyone was naturally intrigued as to what had gone on. It was then that people started to think of Harry as a celebrity rather than just a baby with a famous name. Dumbledore ordered that we leave him alone.  
  
"There was just me and Colin in the club at that stage. Everyone was so used to Colin following Harry around with a camera that even Harry barely noticed anymore. I'm his best friend's sister so no one thought it that unusual if I was occasionally hanging around.  
  
"So...the point of all that was, tomorrow, when your head of house gives you the talk about not stalking Harry Potter, remember you have us to do that for you."  
  
The new members gave a polite smile and exchanged nervous glances between themselves. They'd had this last year too. And the year before. No one quite saw the point of the club till they tried to live with only a few sneaked glances at Harry. He was charisma incarnate; Ginny was drawn to him like a moth to a flame. He got into your blood, circulated your entire body, your mind, your heart. He began to fuel your existence. Ginny sighed. Sitting next to her, Colin cleared his throat pointedly. Ginny snapped back to earth and saw all the people in the club looking worriedly at her.  
  
"Erm...sorry about that. Anyone have any questions?" All the members shook their heads looking slightly bewildered. Ginny grinned brightly.  
  
"Great!" She chirped. "So...our roving photographer Colin managed to dig out some new photos of Harry last year, so these can go in our Harry shrine."  
  
All the old members of the club turned to the wall behind Ginny, the new members craned their necks to get a better look. Ginny pointed her wand at the wall and muttered "revelo!" The stone blocks of the wall flickered and melted away to reveal a door. Ginny drew a key out of her pocket and slipped it into the lock. She opened the door to reveal a tiny room, barely the size of a broom closet. Every inch of the walls were covered in Harry's pictures. In the middle of the room there was a small table, covered with things Harry had touched. Dobby, the only non-human member of the club (It was decided after much debate that Moaning Myrtle was human and was to be the only vitally challenged member. It was also decided that Hedwig was not a member as she often neglected to come to meetings) was particularly forthcoming with Harry memorabilia. It had got to the point where Ron and Harry were joking about an underwear-stealing monster.  
  
Ginny prodded the corner of each photo with her wand to attach them to the wall. She then sidled out of the room to give the other members a better view. Ginny knew every one of the pictures intimately; she didn't need to actually see them. She stood outside the room, leaning on the icy wall. Colin came out and positioned herself in front of him, a little too close for her liking. He had a stagnant smell, like sweat and peanut butter. Ginny winced and moved backwards. Colin looked bewildered at her. Whenever he was close to her, he itched on her skin, crawling against it unpleasantly like maggots. She had to fight the urge to throw up whenever he kissed her.  
  
"Ginny? What's wrong? Have I done something to upset you?" Every fibre of Ginny wanted to shout out, "Yes! You were born!" but she couldn't. Colin was a lovely boy -- irritating as hell, but technically sweet. He made the club; without him she wouldn't have those lovely photos. She'd never cope without having someone to constantly rely on. Ginny shot an irritated look at Colin.  
  
"No Colin. You haven't done anything. It's me. I'm just in a very bad mood."  
  
"Oh," said Colin.  
  
~*~  
  
Ginny's dream that night was odd. She was naked and swimming, swimming underwater with no desire for air. The water was warm, the same temperature as her blood. Ginny felt the water swirl all over her body. It was oddly comforting, like being in a womb. The world was red. She couldn't see anything but red. She realised it was blood but she kept on swimming. She could taste the blood, the bitter, metallic taste consumed all her senses, but she didn't mind. She was happy and warm. Another figure came into view, a shining white figure also swimming in the blood. They danced and played in the blood. Arms grappled on arms, legs slicked together. A deep rhythmic beat was keeping her comfortable. Suddenly there was a desire for air; it was bursting within her lungs. She kicked her legs upward, the blood becoming stiflingly hot and the taste disgusting her. She burst into the air with a deep breath. The other body rose to the surface, not with a burst and a gasp but with a gentle bounce. The body hung limp in the water and turned over to show its face...  
  
Ginny sat up straight in bed and breathed deeply. Tina was snoring loudly in her bed. Allison mumbled slightly before turning over and snuggling down into her pillows. Ginny's heart was pounding violently and her head was buzzingly awake. She was partly scared, sickened, even, by the dream, yet she wanted to be back there, back in the world where it was warm and comforting. Ginny shut her eyes, her mind filled with the image of her own body bathing in blood... she flicked her eyes open again. Ginny lay in her bed in the dark, thinking about the dream, searching for a meaning. Blood seemed to be calling to her these days. The girl in the crystal ball, now this.  
  
The sweat on Ginny's skin made her remember the blood, how it had soaked her. She felt she couldn't sleep whilst she was still clammy and so Ginny got up and padded her way to the bathroom.  
  
The light came on silently when Ginny opened the door. She winced and screwed up her eyes as she moved into the light. She tried to wash the blood out of her mind by washing her body. It didn't work. Ginny dried herself and calmed herself, ready to go to bed.  
  
The mirror in the bathroom showed her cheekbones in a pale blue milky moonlight. Ginny stood transfixed by her reflection. Brown eyes appeared like coals in her face. Shimmering black lenses into the soul. How she wished Harry could see her now; he'd fall in love with her. No one could see her like this, a moon goddess, and not love her.  
  
Ginny tore herself away from her picture and drifted back to her bed. She imagined Harry and Ron sitting around the table in the common room.  
  
"Who do you think is the best looking girl in the school?"  
  
"I dunno, never thought about it, how about you?"  
  
"Ron, please don't be mad with me, but your sister is utterly gorgeous."  
  
Another boy joins, maybe Seamus.  
  
"Who are we talkin' about here?"  
  
"Ginny."  
  
"You're right, Harry. She is gorgeous. Sex on legs that one. And her personality, you can't talk to her and not fall in love with her."  
  
"Don't talk about my sister like that. She's not a sex object. I'll thrash anyone that says she is. "  
  
"So will I, Ron. She is a perfect woman, she needs to be put on a pedestal and worshipped and adored, not perved on."  
  
Smiling happily at these images conjured from her own consciousness, Ginny fell back onto her sweat-drenched sheets and fell asleep.  
  
A violent tapping on Ginny's head pulled her from sleep. She started to massage her temple before realising what had been the cause of her current pain: an owl was rapping on the side of her head with its beak. Ginny took the letter and waved the bird away. The owl flew back to her and hovered over her shoulder as she read the note. She gave it one last look of irritation before reading the note.  
  
"Gin,  
  
Can I meet you before school? I don't think that I can last the day without seeing you again.  
  
I love you.  
  
Colin."  
  
Ginny moaned and closed her eyes. She was tired and really did have a headache. Ginny was really not in the mood to see Colin. She had quite fancied the idea of a quiet breakfast where she could think things through, evaluate her nightmare and plan her day. Ginny looked at the owl resignedly.  
  
"I suppose I need to go see Colin then?"  
  
The owl chirruped excitedly. Ginny froze. If Tina and Allison saw the bird here then she would be in trouble. There were some things in life you could live down, like unleashing a deadly monster on the school, or being Voldemort's best friend. Going out with Colin, on the other hand, was the equivalent of signing your social suicide note.  
  
Ginny wrapped the note around the owl's leg as it had been when she'd recieved it. She grappled for her wand on the bedside table. The owl hovered in front of her face, bright eager eyes staring at her. Ginny looked coldly back at it. The owl faltered before the emotionless gaze.  
  
"Obliviate!" Ginny whispered harshly.  
  
This was the only memory spell Ginny knew. She hoped it would be enough to make the owl forget what it was doing in her room. The owl's eyes closed, the bird fell to the floor in a flump of feathers. Ginny got out of her bed quickly.  
  
"Owl?" she whispered tentatively; Ginny didn't know the bird's name. It didn't matter really; it was only Colin's stupid bird. "Oi! Birdie? Are you alright?"  
  
The owl remained silent and still on the floor. Ginny put her hand on its chest to see if she could feel a heart beat, breath, anything. The bird was completely motioness. It was rapidly cooling as its body heat bled from it into to the cold stone floor. Ginny felt tears prick her eyes. She was going to get into so much trouble. People would find out what spell she'd cast -- that in itself was illegal unless you were with the Ministry. She'd be expelled for sure. Ginny felt her heart begin to pound. How could she explain it? The bird had attacked her. She'd been having a nightmare, yes, that was it, she'd dreamt that she had been an Auror and she'd been chasing a Death Eater, she'd dreamt a Death Eater was prodding her with a wand and she'd cursed him, except when she woke up it was the owl. Yes, that would do it.  
  
Damn it, no! That didn't explain how the owl got there in the first place. What would Tina and Allison say when they found out Colin's bird had visited her? Ginny knew exactly what they would say. They would demand to see the note. They would then tease her mercilessly. Colin would insist on hanging around with them. They would encourage Ginny to go off and be alone with Colin. When the time came for Ginny to rejoin the trio, she'd be an outsider. There was only one thing to do and that was hide the evidence. Make the owl's death appear accidental.  
  
Ginny scooped up the poor little creature and nestled it in her arms. She gave the bird a peck on the head.  
  
"Sorry it ended like this for you. It's not your fault. It's not." Ginny felt oddly compassionate towards the bird; it was a casualty of Colin's selfishness, making a move and ruining an otherwise perfect relationship.  
  
Ginny walked to the window and opened it. She let the chill February air flow into the room. The sun was low and the light was cold and grey. Ginny laid the bird face down on the windowsill. Concentrating very hard, Ginny pointed her wand at the bird and whispered, "Wingardium Leviosa!"  
  
The corpse hovered above the windowsill, its wings drooping down slightly. Ginny guided the bird forward slowly using her wand. She moved to the window to watch its progress. The bird moved as she guided it, swooping over the lawns, its wings still motionless, hanging from its body. The tawny brown corpse collided with the Whomping Willow in a explosion of feathers. No one would ever know the bird wasn't extraordinarily stupid like its owner.  
  
Ginny stood by the window, watching the tree destroy the bird's carcass for daring to invade its space. She shuddered at the sight.  
  
"Shut the window will you, Gin? It's freezing in here!" called a sleepy voice. Ginny wheeled round, cursing herself for not paying attention to whether her roommates were awake or not. Allison was pulling the covers up around her neck and nuzzling the pillow in a disgruntled fashion. Tina was looking around like she had just woken up. The other girls were definitely sound asleep. Jessica was snoring.  
  
"Gin?" Tina was looking sleepy and propping herself up on her elbows. "Are you alright, pet?"  
  
Ginny smiled, perhaps too brightly, a little too happily.  
  
"I'm fine, just thinking what a beautiful morning it is. Beautiful. Yep. Beautiful. Oh what a beautiful morning! Oh what a beautiful...."  
  
Tina cut off Ginny's sing song snippily.  
  
"Ginny, you were up in the night, you're up early now, you sang to try and pretend everything is alright," she said pointedly.  
  
Ginny's smile fell. She looked guiltily at the ground and ran a hand through her hair. When she looked back up at Tina, she was relieved to find that there were tears in her eyes. The suspicion on Tina's face melted, giving way to concern. She sat up properly and propped her back against the headboard.  
  
"Ginny, come here." She patted the bed next to her. Ginny moved over uncertainly and sat down. Tina twisted so she was in front of her.  
  
"Gin, you can tell me." Tina put her hand on Ginny's cheek and wiped the teardrop off it with her thumb. "We're here alone, our mothers aren't here, our sisters aren't here, we're all we've got. If someone's upset you, we'll kick their arse, if something's upsetting you, we'll try to make you feel better or try to sort it out. We're not just fair-weather friends, we're you best friends. Your sisters. Now come here, you silly gingernut!"  
  
Tina held her arms open, Ginny launched herself into her hug. It was cornier than a wheat field in August but it made Ginny feel better to know that even if she wasn't going to tell them everything, even if she really couldn't, they were ready to be there for her. Tina pushed Ginny away slightly and looked at her face.  
  
"Oh and Red, next time you have a nightmare, try not to be so loud with it."  
  
Ginny smiled and wiped her eye.  
  
"I'd better get dressed."  
  
"Yeah, and wash your face, you look awful."  
  
For the first time since her second year, Ginny went down to breakfast with Tina and Allison. Allison was unusually grumpy this morning and she kept shooting evil looks at Ginny and tossing out pointed comments about the room being cold and about open windows. Ginny blushed sheepishly and avoided her eyes.  
  
Ginny sat at the table next to Tina, and scooped porridge into her bowl. Ginny caught sight of Colin's ashen face at the other end of the table. She had an idea. It would please Colin and keep him off her back for ignoring him and it would also not be too damaging for her popularity as it was 'Concerned, nice, popular girl'-ish rather than signs of an actual friendship.  
  
"Colin! What's the matter?" Colin looked up at Ginny; he seemed relieved to see her. Ginny ran round the table.  
  
"I sent you an owl this morning."  
  
"I didn't get it."  
  
Allison and Tina joined her, eager to find out what was wrong and to monopolise the rumour, whatever it was. Ginny put an arm around Colin, as did Allison. Tina leant on the table.  
  
"The owl never made it, Hagrid found a few bits of it on the branches of the whomping willow." Colin looked more miserable than ever. "He reckons that there must have been a breeze or something that blew the owl too close, and the tree must have overreacted..."  
  
"Awww!" Cooed Allison, stroking Colin's hair maternally. "Was it your owl?"  
  
Colin nodded miserably.  
  
"My dad bought it me yesterday, it flew over and arrived this morning. It was its first delivery." Ginny shifted guiltily. Between her normal revulsion of Colin and her current revulsion of herself, Ginny couldn't bring herself to comfort him.  
  
"Oh you poor darling!" Tina exclaimed before throwing her arms around Colin. More of the Gryffindor girls came down.  
  
"What's going on here then?" asked Jessica Bloomford, looking puzzled as to why the elite of the fourth year would be cooing over Colin 'The Camera' Creevy. Ginny couldn't blame them. If she'd come down to find this, she'd have thought she was in an alternate universe.  
  
"Colin's owl was killed by the Whomping Willow this morning."  
  
Before long, all the Gryffindor girls from the year above and the year below were gathered around comforting Colin. Ginny couldn't help but feel a tinge of jealousy. Colin was hers! She owned him! He would throw himself of a cliff if she hinted it might amuse her. He was not supposed to be anyone else's! Ginny tightened her grip around his neck. She began wiping his eyes. To most on-lookers it would have seemed a concerned gesture. It wasn't. It was possessive. My slave, it said, mine.  
  
Then it happened, the thing Ginny waited for every morning. More important than the sunrise and a thousand times more beautiful: Harry. He walked into the Great Hall looking sleepy. He looked so cute in the mornings. His hair was sticking up more than usual and his eyes were half-closed. Ginny couldn't help but smile adoringly at the way that his nose wrinkled as he yawned. Whoever this mystery girlfriend of Harry's was, she obviously didn't appreciate Harry as much as Ginny did. After all, thought Ginny as she gave a quick look around to see if anyone else was looking at Harry in the same way she was, she obviously wasn't here in the morning to see him. Harry was at his most glorious in the morning. His skin glowed. During the day, as he remembered everything he'd seen and as the fears of Voldemort it became matte and ashen, but his view of the world rose tinted by the sun's coral pink light.  
  
Harry sat down first. Ron and Hermione sat on either side of him. Ginny suspected that Harry and Hermione had had a fight; they were not talking, touching, or even making eye contact. Ginny was pleased to note the guilty look in Hermione's eyes. Good, thought Ginny, and so you should feel guilty. If I were Harry's friend, I wouldn't fight with him. Ginny stood, her arms around Colin's neck and her eyes fixed on Harry.  
  
Professor McGonagall walked over to the group. She adjusted her pince-nez before wading right to the centre of the group of girls. Ginny removed herself from around Colin's neck.  
  
"Mr Creevey, Dumbledore would like to see you in his office." The professor peered around the table."I am very glad to see you girls taking care of your housemate like this, a point to Gryffindor, but I am afraid Mr Creevey must come with me. Return to your seats please."  
  
With a groan, the girls began to drift away, leaving a whimpering Colin Creevey to be led away.  
  
"Poor Colin," said Tina, loading up her plate with toast.  
  
"Yeah," sighed Allison before tucking in to a bowl of porridge.  
  
"Poor Colin's owl," Ginny added, reaching for her cup of pumpkin juice. "I mean, imagine being slashed to death by the Whomping Willow..." Ginny faltered at the glare of death that Allison was giving her.  
  
"Gin, do we need to remind you of Tina's weak stomach?" Tina had a pained expression on her face and was pushing her plate of half-eaten toast backwards.  
  
"Sorry," muttered Ginny, hunching her shoulders sheepishly. She reached for her juice again only to find her fingers close on thin air. She looked around. Spotting the cup a few spaces down, she was about to go and get it when a third-year boy sat down at that place. Not only did the cup bounce downwards along the table, but the chair bounced, sending the boy flying backwards into the Ravenclaw marmalade and the cereal on his spoon flying across the table to hit Fred on the nose. The cup came to a rest in front of Harry and Hermione. Perfect, thought Ginny, she could go and get the cup and say hello to Harry at the same time. Out of the corner of her eye she noticed a substantial portion of Fred's porridge depositing itself on the head of the innocent bystander who just happened to be in the general direction from which the previous trajectory had come.  
  
"Morning Harry," chirped Ginny as she picked up her juice. She cursed herself for using the high little-girl voice every time she spoke to him.  
  
"What do you want, Ginny?" The unspoken challenge being 'and if it's not terribly important could you sod off and bother people that like you?' Ginny glared at Ron.  
  
"I just came to get my juice. It's been hopping about all morning, Fred and George I expect. I'm also going to write to mum and ask her to send over my..." Ginny stopped at that point; there was a loud squelch behind her. She turned to see a pool of porridge with a bewildered first year sitting in it. He was throwing apples at the seventh year Slytherin prefect. It seemed an accidental collision between Fred's nose and a spoonful of cornflakes had degenerated into an interhouse free for all.  
  
"For Gryffindor!" squealed Tina, sending a jet of milk flying out of her wand directly into the lap of a Hufflepuff Chaser. Jugs of juice upended themselves from six feet above the tabletops, toast was torn up and thrown like confetti, fried eggs were thown like frizzbees. Harry looked so beautiful when he smiled -- he was even more beautiful when he was covered in baked beans and laughing hysterically as he threw an overripe banana at Draco Malfoy. Ginny jumped back to avoid Neville, who was flying across the table shouting, "Trevor!!!" Trevor the frog was hopping away, trying to escape the stampede of children. Neville reached for him just as he jumped off the table, knocking the cup over and sending it clattering to the floor. The cup smoked slightly and the instant Trevor landed in it, he fell dead.  
  
"No! Trevor!" screamed Neville. Ginny stood motionless with shock, tugging on Harry's arm to alert him. Harry looked briefly, threw a handful of grapes at Cho Chang, and looked back again. This time his jaw dropped.  
  
"Hermione." He looked around for her."Hermione!"  
  
She slid out from under the table. At the sight of Neville's frog, she stopped dead.  
  
"What happened?" Hermione tried to shout over the din. Ginny turned her eyes to the staff table to see if any of them cound be alerted, but none of them were there, they were all trying to stop the food fight.  
  
"Neville's frog!" Ginny shouted. "He landed in the pumpkin juice and died!"  
  
"QUIET!" Professor Snape was standing in the doorway of the hall. He looked as angry as Ginny had ever seen him. His eyes were flashing and his greasy rat-tailed hair flying out behind him. Ginny couldn't help but cower. He spoke in a way that didn't even let you imagine disobeying him.  
  
"Silence! You will all go to your dorms, get changed and make your way to your lessons. If your lesson is cancelled or you do not have a lesson, you are to come here to help with the clean-up. Fifty points from Gryffindor for starting this... melee. Twenty points from Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff for their involvement."  
  
The Slytherins gave a gloating look at the other houses. Snape stepped aside from the doorway and stood looking stern until a few sheepish-looking fifth years started to drift out.  
  
"Professor!" Ginny heard her voice echo slightly in the huge, silent hall. Snape looked at her sternly.  
  
"Miss Weasley?" His voice seemed barely more than a whisper but it cut across the hall with a menace, asking how she dared speak to him at this moment.  
  
"Neville's frog, sir. It jumped off the table and into some juice. It died when it touched the juice."  
  
"It is hardly my business if Mr Longbottom has a substandard toad." Still, Snape strode across the hall to take a look. Ginny stepped back, genuinely worried. Perhaps Snape was right, perhaps it was only Neville having a substandard toad, but the cup had stopped in front of Harry. Perhaps someone had intended it for him. Pearly white patches were spreading over it's skin. Snape looked over the toad for a moment, before stooping to pick it up. Perhaps it was her imagination, but Ginny could have sworn she saw a pearly white patch on Snape's wrist as he reached for the toad, but it was gone before Ginny could take a second glance.  
  
"You are all excused. Well? What are you waiting for? Go get cleaned up." With that, Snape turned on his heel and stormed out of the hall.  
  
Ginny sat on her bed, brushing her hair. Tina and Allison had gone to shower, leaving her alone to analyse her thoughts. She was actually shaken. Apart from the fact that there was someone capable of making such a successful poisoning attempt, the most important thing was that she had nearly lost Harry. Harry was her life force. He'd saved her life in the first year. He'd taken her soul from Tom -- he hadn't given it back. He'd kept it. If Harry died, Ginny didn't know if she could go on living, let alone whether she'd want to. She'd have to look after Harry. Prevent anything from happening to him.  
  
"Tina! I'm going to class. See you down by Hagrid's!"  
  
Ginny slipped out of the door without waiting for a response.  
  
True to form, the grey and rainy days of the summer holidays had melted away to golden sunshine now that term had started again and everyone was trapped indoors. The morning's sun painted the grass with a yellow light and gave Hagrid's cottage a golden tint. Ginny was, for a moment, transported away on the gentle warm breeze that stirred the grass and brushed the leaves on the trees. Ginny was struck by the beauty of Hogwarts. It was truly magnificent whatever the weather. At that moment Ginny felt she would give the world to save Harry. He needed moments like this, as many as possible. The lake looked black but for the little stars of sunlight dancing on the ripples conjured by the breeze.  
  
She was struck by a pull on her heart to run, to feel the air rush on her face and her hair being combed by the wind. Run she did on the downward slope, feet bouncing in the soft, dewy grass. Ginny's heart was beating faster and her breath deepening but she didn't tire. She just ran down to the lake, abandoning thought. A picture formed in her mind: a wild woman, eyes glowing like the coals of a fire, hair lit and blazing like the flames. She imagined she must look amazing. A child of sunlight playing on the earth. As the lake came closer Ginny realised with regret that she would have to stop. She tried to slow down but her momentum was too great. She slowed step by step, finally slipping on the last step, scraping off the top layer of turf to reveal a rich mud and landing unceremoniously on her bottom.  
  
"Ginny! Are you alright?"  
  
Running from Hagrid's hut, hair like raven's wing crowned with golden stars from the sun and glasses flashing like flashlights: Harry. Ginny felt her breath catch, her mind too blissfully blank to react or even to think of the deep crimson blush beginning to rise to her cheeks. Harry extended a hand, looking both embarrassed and concerned. 'He must be worried that someone will come and see him talking to a boring twit like me,' thought Ginny. She flushed, the heat in her cheeks bringing back the image of herself running down hill. She blushed more. How could she even think about herself like that? She was plain, she was fat, she was ugly. Ginny pushed herself up without taking Harry's hand.  
  
"Erm...are you ok?" Harry mumbled. Ginny smiled nervously. This was the second time in two days that she had had an accident with Harry watching. He was going to think she was a total idiot. Ginny brushed herself off, avoiding Harry's gaze. Seeing that she was okay and his help was being spurned, Harry shrugged and started to walk away. Ginny panicked; she didn't want Harry to leave her, she'd rather that he stayed, laughing. She needed to let him leave with a thought other than 'Ron's sister is such a retard.'  
  
"Erm...Harry?" Harry looked over his shoulder at her. Ginny's confidence waned; he didn't want to talk to her.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"How's it going? With your new girlfriend I mean?"  
  
Harry's face broke into a grin. Ginny felt a stab of bitterness that anyone but her should cause him to be that happy.  
  
"Great I guess."  
  
Ginny smiled again. He was embarrassed of his girlfriend! He really was looking for a way to get out, so he could get to her. Her smile widened till it threatened to break into a grin. Harry dug his hands into his pockets and shifted awkwardly.  
  
"Um... I have to go to Potions. See you later. Bye, Gin."  
  
"Aren't you going to tell me who it is?" Ginny called after him, curiosity rising within her suddenly. Harry merely turned round and gave her a grin so charming that Ginny could do nothing but smile back, a misty look in her eyes. It was in this light-headed state that Ginny walked down to Hagrids hut.  
  
She was one of the first to arrive, there was a tiny knot of Slytherins in the corner talking amongst themselves, but no one else. Ginny stood on the grass, embarrassed by her loneliness, proclaiming to all who cared to see that she was still the same outsider she had been in the first year. Tina and Allison's friendship of pity had not raised her in anyone's eyes.  
  
Ginny remembered this from after her first year, hearing Professor McGonagall telling her mother "She just needs some friends in her own year, the poor wee lamb. I've taken the liberty of talking to two of her housemates, seeing if they'd take her under their wings for a while. Poor thing. Her confidence must be absolutely shattered." A large part of Ginny had never been so humiliated in her entire life. The rest of her was relieved; she'd have someone, someone to stop her being so conspicuously and pathetically alone. Ginny didn't know what had kept them looking after her so long. She appreciated it, but never truly felt comfortable with them.  
  
Ginny looked at the grass, checking that none of Hagrid's creatures had answered a call of nature on it, before sitting down and looking at the lake, mind blank but for thoughts of Harry. Harry on his broom, determined and focused as he swooped for the dragon's egg in her third year; Harry's eyes, fiery with desire, as he swooped for the Snitch, snatching victory from Malfoy's grasp. It had been ages since Ginny had seen him play Quidditch. She was rather looking forward to seeing that again. There was nothing like the passionate focus as he played and the gay abandon of his jubilation as he won. Harry's unguarded smile was always wonderful, especially when it was so powerful. Harry also looked especially sexy when he was playing Quidditch, strong thighs driving the broom, Quidditch robes pressed against his sculpted chest. When was the next Quidditch match again?  
  
"Morning!" a deep voice boomed.  
  
Ginny shook herself and looked around for the owner of the voice. Hagrid was standing holding a blanket folded over one arm. He was smiling proudly. Ginny grinned at him, though slightly annoyed at being roused from her day dream.  
  
"Good morning, Hagrid! How was your holiday?" Hagrid had been Ginny's only friend in the first year. He'd caught her hanging around his hut, waiting to see if Harry would visit, and invited her in. He was a great friend but she couldn't see him much anymore. Tina and Allison would never stop laughing if they found out she visited his cottage. Hagrid smiled at her and tapped the side of his nose in a very conspiratorial fashion.  
  
"Ah, I can't be telling you that. Top secret, between Dumbledore and myself."  
  
Ginny smiled curiously but wasn't very interested. Dumbledore had said Voldemort had returned; any private business was likely to be that. It was actually very hard to believe Voldemort was back; the papers said nothing. Her father and brothers were rarely around, but that wasn't unusual; Charlie and Bill were always away. Percy was a workoholic. Her dad's absence was the main difference, though even that wasn't noticable when her grandparents descended upon them to 'help' her mum whilst she was alone in the house and their son was out fighting the good fight. It amused Ginny that her dad's parents loved her mum for being the provider of so many grandchildren, whilst her mum's parents hated her dad for stifling their daughter's potential. They did love the grandchildren though. Ginny idly wondered what Hagrid had been up to, but did not dwell on it. Voldemort's rise was only of concern to her as it put Harry at risk. Any danger to Harry terrified her.  
  
"Don't you be letting your imagination run away with you lass. It were just a little errand that Dumbledore wanted running. "  
  
Ginny snapped back to earth again.  
  
"Sorry, I was miles away. You really got me curious there."  
  
Hagrid ruffled her hair and beamed down at her.  
  
"Course you are. But I'm not telling you. I've caused enough trouble in my time by accidentally letting things slip. My visit to the giants is going to remain completely secret till Dumbledore says otherwise. I should not have told you that...."  
  
Ginny smiled understandingly. Hagrid was right. He did have a nasty habit of telling people things. It was a quality that Ginny at ease. If he was hiding anything from her, it never stayed hidden for long.  
  
"I won't tell anyone."  
  
"Course you won't. Course you won't. You're a good girl, Gin. "  
  
"Yep, that she is." Chimed in Tina, putting her arms around Ginny's neck and smiling up at Hagrid. "Hello, Professor Hagrid, have you lost weight?"  
  
Hagrid blushed, gave Ginny a small wave and headed over to a empty enclosure. As soon as Hagrid was out of earshot, Allison gave a giggle and gave Tina a small shove.  
  
"Stop sucking up, Ginny'll get jealous."  
  
Ginny glowered. The rest of the class had now arrived, and were all looking around puzzledly, trying to see if they could find anything that they might be having a lesson on. Hagrid did not do theory lessons. They were all practical. There was nothing, however, but the empty enclosure. "Gather round, that's it, can everyone see? Yeah? Good. Now, this here is a Tebo. It's in your text book if you care to look, but I don't suppose you do. It's a type of boar. It can become invisible if it's scared or feeling protective. Bessie in here's pregnant so she's spending a lot of time invisible at the moment. I'm going to throw this blanket over so you can get an idea of the size of her." Hagrid cast the blanket up into the air. It spread out and draped over the entire enclosure before settling to the groud and hugging the shape of a giant sow. It was a good five feet long and three feet high. Ginny, despite growing up in the country, had seen few pigs and even fewer big sows like this, and fewer still that reached this magnitude.  
  
"Now, Bessie here is a docile creature, but she's mighty vicious when provoked, so don't go frightening her. Invisible creatures are hard to bring down, and she's mighty strong too."  
  
The class all peered into the enclosure to get a look at the bulge in the blanket.  
  
"The Tebo is a protected species. The skin can be used to make armoured invisbility clothing. It's very tough and much more precise than an invisibity cloak as it's usually tighter fitting. Also, the teeth -- not the little ones but them big ones on either side of the mouth -- can be made into jewellery which makes the wearer invisible."  
  
There was an 'Ooh' from the class.  
  
"They need roughly the same things as normal pigs, so scraps and a sty. They are just hard to catch, what with them being invisible and all. So erm... take them notes down then."  
  
Hagrid was temperamentally unsuited to being a teacher. He couldn't plan a lesson or hold the attention of the class beyond the first few minutes. He normally relied on the monster of the day to keep the class in order. This was failing to work today as a large, invisible, stationary warthog was not sufficient to keep thirty pupils from sitting on the grass talking to one another. Tina sat with Allison leaning over her lap, idly plaiting her hair, whilst Ginny sprawled next to her making a daisy chain. It was currently three daisies long; Ginny had a lot of trouble finding daisies with enough stems and then when she split the stem it kept tearing. She discarded it.  
  
"Gin?"  
  
Ginny looked up at Tina, squinting slightly as the sun was in her eyes. Tina was also squinting back at Ginny.  
  
"Would you hate me if I were to tell you I fancy the pants off your brother?"  
  
Ginny's eyes bugged out.  
  
"What!?"  
  
"I know, but he's funny, and he's sweet, he's really good looking too. Come on, he's also the second most famous boy in the fifth year. Do you mind?"  
  
Ginny's mind swam. Apart from the idea that one of her friends might fancy her brother, (which was disgusting) there was also the fact that her brother was Harry's best friend. If Tina were going out with Ron, then Ginny would be perfectly justified in hanging around with their group. Oh dear god, it was perfect! Ginny beamed.  
  
"No. I don't mind at all, in fact I find it... sweet." Allison looked up and raised an eyebrow.  
  
"Sweet? Gin, tell her she could do better? Come on, no offence, but your brother is not exactly gorgeous."  
  
"Oi!" Exclaimed Tina, giving Allison a playful slap on the head. "He's adorable, plus, not everything is about looks." Both Ginny and Allison raised eyebrows questioningly at Tina. Tina blushed.  
  
"Look, yep, I could do better, but currently I want to do Ron Weasley. Besides Al, I don't know what you're laughing at, like you haven't had your own little Weasley crush in the past.  
  
"Come on! They're beaters! Such big muscles, and they're so funny! Plus, I was eleven, you can't hold that against me."  
  
"I know," Ginny chimed in, "some of us had really embarrassing schoolgirl crushes."  
  
"Oh?" asked Allison sarcastically. "And who did little Red have a crush on? I think I may have missed the signs."  
  
Tina patted Allison on the back jokingly.  
  
"Don't worry about it. Any old idiot can miss a girl sending a boy a singing valentine."  
  
Ginny buried her head in her arms.  
  
"That wasn't me! It was... erm... Colin."  
  
Allison giggled.  
  
"I could believe that."  
  
Hagrid let the class go slightly early. Well, actually the class decided that it was leaving and drifted away; Hagrid did nothing to stop them. Ginny gave a small, apologetic wave and left the fields and headed up to the school with Tina and Allison. She toyed with the idea of going up to Harry's lesson to make sure that nothing had happened to him between classes, but didn't know what his new timetable was. Vince Crabbe normally told her, since Malfoy normally had the same timetable as Harry, except he did Arithmancy rather than Divination. Crabbe normally took a week to deliver the timetable so Ginny was in the dark. She sighed.  
  
"What's up, Red?" Ginny looked at her friends to see if she could determine which one had spoken. She couldn't, but she didn't suppose it mattered.  
  
"Nothing, I just have a bit of a headache. I'm going to go to the hospital wing and see if Madam Pomfrey can do anything about it."  
  
"Want us to come with you?"  
  
Ginny shook her head.  
  
"No, it's alright, I won't be a minute, I'll see you in... erm what have we got next?"  
  
"Erm... Defence Against the Dark Arts?"  
  
"Yeah. See you there."  
  
And Ginny dashed up the hill. It occurred to her when she reached the castle that she was supposed to have a headache and shouldn't have run all the way up. She made a small show of leaning on the wall with her head on her hand for a few seconds before staggering into the school building.  
  
The school was cool and very dark after the bright sunlight. Ginny squinted into the gloom to even see where the exits from the room were. She waited for her eyes to get used to the darkness and then put her wand to her lips.  
  
"Find Harry," she whispered to the tip of her wand. Ginny winced at the awkwardness of the spell but, she thought indignantly, no one had ever said magic could only understand Latin.  
  
A tiny blue spark flared from Ginny's wand before drifting quickly down the corridor  
  
Ginny followed it as carefully as she could. Trying to look neither too furtive nor too much like she was following an ominous looking blue spark. Her wand was ready to stop the spell at the first sign of a teacher. She also had to stop the spell before it hit Harry. Your magic was the purest essence of you. She didn't want Harry to know her that well. There was dark in her. Tom's magic had flowed in her blood, mixing with her own magic, like ink sprawling across a page. He was in there now, black and thick in her soul. She wanted to bask in Harry's light, not have him cower from her darkness. The spark began to speed up; it was getting closer. Ginny broke into a run to follow it. She skidded to a halt and panted "Finite Incantum!" just as it veered sideways and through a classroom door. An instant later, the handle started to rock; someone was fumbling with the door, trying to open it.  
  
Ginny threw caution to the wind and ran. She sprinted around the nearest corner and stood there with her back pressed against the wall. She peeked round the corridor. Harry stepped out of the door, looking puzzled and shocked and rubbing at his jumper at the height the spark had been at. He peered into the darkness and touched his scar briefly.  
  
Ginny saw that he muttered something but -- she breathed a sigh of relief -- it hadn't been her name. 


End file.
